Sad Day.

Well my dr's appointment didn't go well and we lost the baby. According to my first appointment I didn't measure as far along as I thought so they bumped me back from 7 weeks to 5 weeks. Which would have meant I knew I was pregnant at 2 weeks- which is way too early for an at home test. So I believe I was 9 weeks today instead of their adjusted 7 weeks. This is so much harder than I thought it was going to be. I feel like I have lost the baby twice. First when I started bleeding and now again today. The two weeks of limbo and gaining hope back has made it worse. Its just so hard and I want to be by myself and drown myself in ice cream. I know its not healthy but that's how I want to cope right now. Adam has his Tuba recital tomorrow evening and his parents were planning on coming up for the day. I called his mom and asked her to come up a day early to help watch the kids while I grieve.